Star Fukk: The Swingin' Sixties' Generation

Jim Jerk bends forward, beads of sweat flowing copiously from the furrows in his brow as, concentrating furiously, he endeavors to complete what - to millions of fans (Fukkies) and ordinary viewers (Fuckers) all over the world - is affectionately known as the Captain's slog. Mister Spunk vents his muppetry, 'Pardon me sir, but do you think the bridge is the appropriate place for such a gratuitous display of human emotion?' Jerk is his usual iracible self, 'When I want your opinion Mister, I'll ask for it!' Despite the vehemence of his tin pot god, Spunk has the persistence of his full can intellect: 'It's most illogical Captain.' Jerk, however, doesn't seem to have any respect for the cans of his fellow orifices, 'Damn you Mister Spunk! Coming from a pointy-eared green-blooded alien with a three-inch penis -' Spunk cuts him short, 'A regrettable display of animosity Captain - and also grossly inaccurate. Current status is approximately 3.19231456 -'

Autorentext

At Moorfield Junior School, Bridlington, East Yorkshire, Robin Bright was awarded his red 10 yard badge for swimming across the pool, as the green 25 yard badge was awarded for swimming lengthways, and the 75 yard blue badge was awarded for three lengths of the pool.